I made all the right mistakes….

Anxiety my old friend…

Other than my dreams, yesterday I was pretty anxious and impatient at work,wanted to shoot my boss because he wouldn’t shut up on the phone (personal calls).
Had to msg my husband and ask him to get me out of here (take me for lunch).
Today I’m okay, but I brought my anxiety medicine with me just in case.

No weird scary dream last night!! \o/
Just a plain normal dream..
My mom had built this business for my brother it seems like a video rental and in the other side used stuff for sale. And in the back there was 5 bedrooms ..really nice shaped house, all made with really nice shiny wood.
But I had one complaint..instead of having a regular stairs to go down to the rooms, from the business they had a ladder on the wall for you to go down. And I was pissed about it, I could not understand how they could have built this awesome house with a ladder..
And my grandfather (that passed away 6 years ago) was with us and was a struggle for him to make up and down these ladders.
So they decide to put a cable connecting upstairs to downstairs and you had to go though the cable …and my mom was showing how easy it was to climb the cable and I was still pissed telling how much easier would be to build a staircase.
In the end we were  upstairs, my aunt, uncle, cousins, grandma, grandpa, my mom, my brother and my husband eating deserts (there was a buffet with many deserts and salt snacks.) So me and Danny my cousin were eating deserts non-stop..I remember offering a coxinha (pastry) to my grandpa but he wasn’t feeling good..
He fell on the ground on his knees and everybody was trying to help him, his legs gave up on him.
That was interesting because about 3 years before he got diagnosed with Alzheimer’s he had a fall, and was complaining about his legs, I remember that on that week I had a  dream of seeing my grandpa sitting on his living room with his legs amputated and later on being on a wheelchair.
I woke up crying and went to sleep with my mom, she made me calm down.
Years later he would be riding the wheelchair, but he did not have his legs amputated. He did stay as a vegetable in bed for about 3 years before dying. It was very hard on my whole family and more than anything for him, as he was always an independent man, to depend on everybody for everything was hard, mom grandma said that every time they had to change his diaper or something like that he would have tears in his eyes.
At the end of the dream I remember my husband saying that he would love to live in that house. And that was about it.


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